Kate Motaung, Author at Flower Mound Christian Counseling

Every Good Gift: Overcoming Rejection and Insecurity

Every Good Gift: Overcoming Rejection and Insecurity

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:28:49+00:00April 15th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

There are countless ways that we may experience rejection. From childhood to adulthood, these wounds are usually inflicted by those with whom we felt safe such as parents, partners, or other influential people. When we are experiencing the fallout from disapproval, denied love, attention, or interest, it is important that we soak in the Truth of God’s Word as our remedy. Although the enemy seeks to destroy us with perception, whether it is how we perceive others or how we believe that they see us, he operates in lies. While everyone may not receive the gift of who we are, we still have immeasurable value. When we elevate the opinion of people above our Maker, we afflict our souls with shame and rejection. As a result, we partner with insecurity and agree with a lowly self-view that God didn’t create or endorse. Although others may have rejected you, the Father does not. Others may have withdrawn themselves from you, but you can embrace the self-compassion and grace to heal and redeem what is broken and lost. Search Scripture and find where you are seen and known, accepted, and beloved as the Father’s dear child. Fight rejection by agreeing with God’s Word Break up with the wrong view that suggests you are inadequate in any way. The voice of the accuser often works against us to promote insecurity and disconnection from our true identity. When we consistently read and hear the Truth of God’s Word, we train our souls to identify with it personally. When we submit ourselves to God’s authority, despite what our emotions and experiences may scream, we transform and evolve. This frees us to encounter and discover who God knew was there all along. Acknowledge what the Father calls good You worship God when you agree with [...]

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Stable in the Storm: Bible Verses for Finding Strength in Hard Times

Stable in the Storm: Bible Verses for Finding Strength in Hard Times

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:30:45+00:00November 10th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

Whether we view life as a roller coaster or a carousel, the endless motion can dizzy us and throw us off course without the stability of God’s Word. However, God’s gives us strength in hard times to emerge from every challenge, thriving and encountering a fresh dimension of glory. Jesus has already secured victory, having conquered every principality and power that masterminds the evil we see playing out in the world (Colossians 2:15; Ephesians 6:12). While this may be part of our reality, trials are not meant to defeat us, but rather to learn facets of God’s character and become more like Jesus. While we learn much through these experiences, we can refer to the Scripture to gather the grace needed to chart through difficulty and Bible verses to find strength in hard times. God’s Word releases purpose. When we read, study, and apply Scriptural principles, we heal, grow, and change. Furthermore, we gather insight into our own identity and kingdom authority as sons and daughters. God has fashioned us with a holy calling that we don’t have to cower from. We can walk confident and worthy of this, simply because He has called us (2 Timothy 1:9; Ephesians 4:1; 1 Peter 2:9). The unique assignments that God has prepared us for await us to exercise the natural and spiritual gifts with which He has equipped us (Ephesians 2:10; 1 Corinthians 12:4, 12-13). In doing so, the active nature of God’s Word works from within to help us advance the gospel, discipling others through our testimony and life transformation. God’s Word releases power. There are countless unknowns we will encounter in life. However, the one answer we need above all is Jesus Himself, the Word of God (John 1:1,14). When we arm ourselves, resolving to meditate on Bible verses [...]

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3 Fun Activities to Do with Your Teen

3 Fun Activities to Do with Your Teen

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:30:52+00:00August 17th, 2023|Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured, Relationship Issues|

When was the last time you did something fun with your teen? Most parents must go back to before their teen years to answer this. Although your teen is growing up, and he or she has changed, you can still have fun with him or her. The key to having fun with your teen is not to force it. Teens don’t enjoy being forced to do things. Part of what teens long for is the ability to make decisions for themselves. When you force them to do something, they will likely decline or make the time miserable for both of you. Instead, try these fun activities to do with your teen and give them some control of the situation. Giving teens the ability to choose goes a long way to creating trust and connection. 3 Fun Activities to Do with Your Teen 1. Go to a game or concert with your teen. Think about what your teen likes. Does she love soccer? Does he always listen to a certain kind of music? See what you can do that falls within his or her interest. It may not be what you would choose, but this is about doing something your teen loves so you can be with him or her. Try going to a local sporting event or check out a live band at a restaurant. See what your teen might like and give it a try. Remember, the key is for you to try something he or she likes without judgment. 2. Play their game or try their app. Don’t do this on their devices but see what you can learn about the games or apps teens enjoy. Is there a video game your son is always playing, an online puzzle your teen is always solving, or a social [...]

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How to Deal With Anxiety: Finding Help from God’s Word

How to Deal With Anxiety: Finding Help from God’s Word

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:31:00+00:00August 7th, 2023|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Out of all human emotions, anger and fear are probably the most problematic. Both emotions can have significant consequences for our lives if they are not handled well. In this article, we will discuss how to deal with anxiety by exploring what the Bible has to say about it. What does anxiety look and feel like? Fear goes by many names – anxiety, worry, distress, dismay, trepidation, dread, and many more. It varies by degree of intensity, from a feeling of slight unease up to absolute terror. We can express our fear in many ways: Repetitive, racing, or spiraling thoughts. Sweaty palms, increased heart rate, dry mouth, a “pit” in your stomach, difficulty sleeping, or disordered eating. Withdrawal from or avoidance of certain relationships or environments. Hampered ability to focus or pay attention, or by a feeling of paralysis in deciding what to do next. Sometimes fear is not immediately obvious. It can manifest as other emotions such as anger or be expressed through behaviors such as a preoccupation with cleaning or becoming organized, for example. What degree of fear do you most often feel, or frequently becomes an issue for you? How do you express your anxiety? What is the underlying reason for anxiety? The underlying reason for anxiety has to do with control. They are two sides of the same coin. We want to control something, but we can’t, so we become anxious about it. The common factor across every reason for anxiety is uncertainty. We feel vulnerable because we cannot control something and thus the future is uncertain. What do you feel anxious about? Naming your worries helps you to see that they are finite and specific rather than endless. Writing them down helps this process and helps to rest your mind from the thoughts chasing themselves [...]

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6 Tips for Preventing Burnout

6 Tips for Preventing Burnout

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:31:08+00:00July 20th, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Professional Development, Spiritual Development|

Have you ever felt like you had nothing else to give? As if you can’t keep going in your job, your daily responsibilities, or a family responsibility? If so, you may be experiencing burnout. The concept of burnout represents feeling overwhelmed, spent, or exhausted by a situation you are in. It is a type of stress that is carried for some time without relief. This can happen to people at any age in any situation. It is less about what you are facing than it is about how it feels for you. When do people feel burnout? Burnout is a real issue for people in so many scenarios. There are no rules to burnout, whom it affects, why it impacts them, or for how long. Some examples of times people feel burnout are: In a job where they work hard and feel underappreciated. Functioning as a caregiver for someone with medical needs. As a stay-at-home parent responsible for the needs of the family and household. During school when you feel the pressure of assignments and achievement. These are just a few examples. The possibilities vary as much as the people who experience burnout. Preventing burnout If we are all at risk for burnout in a variety of scenarios, how do we prevent it? Can we do anything to ensure that we don’t struggle with emotional, physical, or mental exhaustion brought on by prolonged stress? While there are no guarantees, there are some tools that you can build into your life now to prevent burnout in the future. Get adequate sleep. Sleep is an important part of your overall well-being. Getting the right amount of quality sleep for your body and brain will help you function well daily and equip you to better handle stress in your life. This can [...]

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When to Stop Drinking Alcohol: Deciding If a Few Drinks a Night is a Problem

When to Stop Drinking Alcohol: Deciding If a Few Drinks a Night is a Problem

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:31:15+00:00April 29th, 2023|Chemical Dependency, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues|

There are plenty of reasons why people drink. It’s a social activity. They like the taste. It’s an easy way to unwind. It’s always been part of their routines. They deserve it after a long day. While most of us know when to stop and can regulate how much we drink, it is good sometimes to check in and ask if you are drinking for the right reasons. The Bible has plenty of instances of people getting drunk and doing dumb things. Noah passed out after getting out of the ark, disgracing himself in front of his sons (Genesis 9:20-23). Lot’s daughters got him so drunk he passed out and they had sex with him (Genesis 19:30-38). David attempted to get Uriah drunk in hopes he’d sleep with Bathsheba, but the man refused (2 Samuel 11:13). There are instances when alcohol is used in celebration. Jesus’ first miracle was turning water into the best wine at a wedding feast (John 2:1-11). The Israelites were encouraged to spend money on alcohol to bring as a tithe and to celebrate their offerings to the Lord (Deuteronomy 14:22-29). God’s prophets promise that when Israel returns home, God will bless them with wine aplenty (Amos 9:14, Joel 2:19, and 3:18). Jesus compares His body to wine, telling His disciples to use it as a symbol and reminder of the sacrifice He was preparing to make (see Matthew 26:17-30). In 1 Corinthians 9:19-23, Paul encourages people in the church to abstain from drinking if it would cause another person to stumble. He explains that it is out of love for others that we sometimes deny ourselves what we can handle if we know that those around us cannot. Alcohol in itself is not wrong. It is the abuse of it, or letting it master [...]

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Counseling For Toxic Couples: What You Need To Know

Counseling For Toxic Couples: What You Need To Know

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:31:23+00:00April 25th, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. One reason for that is that we live in an imperfect world, but alongside that is the reality that we are imperfect people. Even if the world were perfect, imperfect people would make short work of it. We bring our imperfections into our relationships, and sometimes we overcome our worst impulses. Other times, the person that we’re with is imperfect in different ways and when paired together it all works. In other situations, two imperfect people come together, and they don’t bring out the best in each other. Instead, some of their worst impulses are either encouraged or given free rein, running amok in the relationship. This causes immense damage to both of the people in the relationship and others that may be within the couple’s sphere of influence. When relationships flourish, they can be beautiful, and that’s what God wants for people. Healthy relationships bring wholeness, support growth, maintain accountability, and promote flourishing. The other side of flourishing relationships is toxic relationships, and these can be between friends, lovers, parents and their children, and siblings. If you are in a toxic romantic relationship, there is help available in both individual and couples counseling. Counseling can transform your relationship by helping you understand what has gone wrong in the relationship and why. Not only that, but one can learn new ways to be themselves in a relationship. Signs of a toxic relationship To begin with, what does a toxic relationship look like? The word ‘toxic’ is quite prevalent in our world today. Essentially, it refers to deeply problematic and unhealthy traits within a relationship, things that hinder or undermine the flourishing of the couple. To frame it within a Christian worldview, it relates to ingrained sinful patterns and habits that [...]

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Plumbing the Deep: Navigating the Shame of Family Secrets

Plumbing the Deep: Navigating the Shame of Family Secrets

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:31:31+00:00April 24th, 2023|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

It doesn’t take much reading before we realize that the Bible contains family secrets between its covers. Scandals line the pages of Scripture, sandwiched in between the prevailing force of God’s lavish love. While we read the intrigue and espionage laced throughout, we might wonder why God chose to continue with humanity as we know it. Not a lot has changed throughout the ages, but the Father has remained consistent in His endeavor to woo and win wandering sons and daughters. Within our own families, we may have whispered, covered, and kept quiet, restraining secrets that strain the corners of our family tapestries as well. In families that experience deep dysfunction, we exert an extraordinary amount of energy trying to cover pain that we ignore, medicate, or even over-spiritualize. We may be tempted to remain hushed about family secrets and sins, but silence does nothing but perpetuate shame. It not only internalizes elements that have given rise to negative behavioral patterns, but it keeps us imprisoned in a narrative that pollutes our view of ourselves, others, and God. Secrets may be part of our family’s past, and to some degree our present experience, but we don’t have to be loyal to its legacy for future generations. The way out. We can break our partnership with the lies and family secrets of the past and choose the truth that sets us free. God wants to bring the reality of Scripture off the page and into our lives. Jesus, as the Word of God, literally put on flesh, lived a human experience to model what it looked like for us to live free from the skeletons in our family closet. In His torturous death, He became God’s Answer, lighting our bloodline’s path out of darkness into Truth and Life. Resurrected, His [...]

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Bullying Prevention is Possible With Help

Bullying Prevention is Possible With Help

Kate Motaung2024-10-29T12:31:38+00:00January 6th, 2023|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured|

Bullying is a serious and significant problem that affects our children and so bullying prevention is a topic parents should understand. It is a form of violence that can have a lasting negative effect on the health of the person bullied, and the bully. In essence, bullying is when the more powerful party repeatedly acts in a way that hurts and distresses the person targeted. Harm can be inflicted on the victim in a wide variety of ways, some examples include: physically, through hitting, shoving, and tripping; psychologically, through teasing and name-calling, as well as social harm through spreading rumors or excluding someone from the group. Damage to the victim's property is also understood to be bullying. Unfortunately, bullying is not limited to physical interactions but can be done through any means of communication including social media. This is known as cyberbullying or electronic bullying. Bullying is a widespread problem. The repeated nature of victimization and the significant adverse effects of bullying on all parties involved makes the fact that bullying is fairly common all the more tragic. It is not simply the victim and perpetrator who are negatively impacted but the bystanders too. The Centre for Disease Control and Prevention found that 25% of high school students admitted to being bullied while at school while more than 15% of high school students said they were bullied electronically. Another way to understand this is to say that of your child and their four friends, one has been bullied while at school. As bullying is dependent on a power imbalance, logically, some youths are bullied more than others. It happens across genders and cultures, throughout childhood and adolescence. Consequences. The effects of bullying range from physical injury to social and emotional distress, it can create an environment for self-harm and [...]

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Are You Ready to Date Again?

Are You Ready to Date Again?

Kate Motaung2024-10-30T09:00:55+00:00December 7th, 2022|Featured, Individual Counseling, Premarital Counseling, Relationship Issues|

It is not always easy to determine when you are ready to date again, particularly after a breakup or after spending a lot of time by yourself. If you are thinking about dating, consider thinking about some important things first. Some signs that you are ready are when you have personal passions and hobbies, when you have identified your goals and values, and when you have reflected on previous relationships. If you spend a lot of time talking about or thinking about your ex, or if you use dates as an escape from feeling lonely, you may have more work to do. According to Victoria Goldenberg, a therapist and member of the media advisory group at the Hope for Depression Research Foundation, reflecting on your personal growth and previous relationships can help you gauge your ability to foster new and healthy connections with other singles. Goldenberg shared this insight with Insider. Signs that You are Ready to Date Again Keep an eye out for these signs to determine whether or not you are physically, mentally, and emotionally ready to date again. You may be ready to date if you are an individual with your own circle of friends and pursuits. According to Goldenberg, ensuring that you have a distinct sense of who you are will position you for a successful dating experience. This is regardless of how long you’ve been single or how recently you ended a previous romantic commitment. It is a good indicator that you are prepared to meet someone new if you can name several interests and activities that you pursue to provide yourself pleasure and satisfaction. It’s not healthy for a person to go into a relationship to find happiness. You are the architect of your own joy in life, and the person you [...]

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Kate Motaung

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