Joanna Kucherera, Author at Flower Mound Christian Counseling

9 Reasons Why Male Friendships Are Important

9 Reasons Why Male Friendships Are Important

Joanna Kucherera2024-09-25T08:50:37+00:00November 20th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Relationship Issues|

From the time they are boys, men are indoctrinated into a world that does them harm more than good in the long run. Over the past couple of years, there have been conversations about toxic masculinity, but we need to start having conversations about some of the stereotypes and expectations put on men that are detrimental to their health and well-being. One of those aspects that needs to be revisited is the role and importance of male friendships. Many young boys found it easy to form and maintain friendships when they were young. It was an integral part of who they were. As they grow older though, these friendships most of the time dwindle. One of the contributing factors has been this harmful notion that men need to be stoic in their manner and learn to stand on their own; masculinity demands autonomy. The concept of having close friendships, especially those you share your life and feelings with is frowned upon, which then makes it difficult for men to seek healthy relationships with other men. With loneliness being a global health pandemic, it is important to advocate for male friendships. Even in the wild, animals rely on each other for their sole survival. We are no different. Human beings are social being and our health and well-being is tied to our community and our relationships, hence having male friendships is vital for other men. To counteract loneliness and isolation, which have negative effects on men’s health, it is important as a society we encourage and make it normal for men to have close, dependable, and strong friendships. Why male friendships are important. Emotional Support. Men also have emotional needs. By having friendships, men can have safe spaces where they can be vulnerable, share their fears, and seek emotional support [...]

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8 Common Signs of Abandonment Issues

8 Common Signs of Abandonment Issues

Joanna Kucherera2024-09-25T08:49:23+00:00June 12th, 2023|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Abandonment issues stem from a deep-rooted fear of being rejected, hurt, or abandoned. Caused by many factors which can include childhood trauma such as abuse, neglect, death of a parent, incarceration of a parent, illness or divorce, abandonment issues can have significant effects on people in their adult relationships.8 Common Signs of Abandonment IssuesBecause abandonment issues are caused by many different factors, they will manifest differently in different individuals. There are, however, some common signs of abandonment issues one can look out for:Intense fear of rejection. Having abandonment issues means one is afraid of being rejected or left alone. This is because they have experienced it before due to childhood traumas and they try not to feel that way again. This fear however can hinder how they relate to others and in turn manifest that which they fear.Very low self-esteem. Those with abandonment issues will have very low regard for themselves. They constantly feel worthless and not worthy of love and acceptance. This is why they are constantly seeking approval or reassurance. They never feel what they are or who they are is enough.Avoidance behavior. For fear of being rejected, those with abandonment issues will forego situations where they feel they might be rejected. This can be seen in how they avoid social gatherings, family meetings, or company activities. They feel safer by avoiding it.Needy and clingy. Once they are in a relationship or friendship with someone, people with abandonment issues can become very needy and clingy, emotionally suffocating those close to them. They fear being alone so much that they will make sure they are constantly in the presence of their partner or friend. This can again have the negative effect of driving people away.Codependency. Codependency is the excessive dependence on another person for assurance, well-being, and identity. To [...]

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How to Become an Active Listener

How to Become an Active Listener

Joanna Kucherera2024-09-25T08:51:32+00:00November 18th, 2022|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

As adults, we spend most of each day communicating, and 55% of this communication consists of listening and observing. We listen to gain information, we listen to understand, and we listen for enjoyment. Some people tend to be on the quieter side, talking less and being more observant of details like body language and people’s moods, making one a good active listener. Others, who are more talkative and less aware of details, make only decent listeners, but not good active listeners. However, with practice, both types can become better active listeners. Hearing or listening? The difference between listening and hearing is focus and intentionality. A person may relay information to us and, without trying at all, we will register the facts of the information and little else. This is hearing. We may only be hearing when it comes to instances like a child talking about their day at school, a teacher conducting a dull lesson, or a colleague sharing information you have already heard. We might call this “skim listening” or “scan listening,” meaning that we are simply listening for information and no other details. Active listening is when we pay careful attention to all that is being communicated to us, both verbally and non-verbally. Not only do we take in and understand what is being said, but we discern what remains unsaid, and we respond to, reflect and react appropriately to the communication. This makes the speaker feel valued, seen, heard, and understood. It takes practice and patience to become a good active listener. It begins with being intentional about absorbing as much information from the communication as possible. Working at developing and improving active listening can greatly impact our parenting, our relationships, and even our career. What does being an active listener look like? When we communicate, we [...]

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How to Deal with Loneliness: Causes and Coping Strategies

How to Deal with Loneliness: Causes and Coping Strategies

Joanna Kucherera2024-09-25T08:48:15+00:00July 13th, 2022|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

Everyone needs social connection and fulfilling friendships, whether they are aware of it or not. We desire to be seen, understood, and appreciated for who we are. When those needs are not met, we may feel distressed and uneasy. This uncomfortable feeling is loneliness. Loneliness can be experienced on a spectrum of intensity, from occasional and mild to chronic and debilitating. No one is immune from experiencing loneliness, including married people, partnered people, and children. Before 2020, loneliness was so prevalent across the United States, Asia, and the United Kingdom that it was already labeled a “behavioral epidemic.” In the post-pandemic world, the number of people experiencing loneliness has only climbed. Loneliness has been linked to an array of health issues, including heart disease, Type 2 diabetes, arthritis, increased production of stress hormones, poor sleep patterns, and weakened immune systems. This may not be an easy topic for people to tackle. In the case of a lonely spouse, there may be shame and even guilt in admitting to feelings of loneliness. However, before we can determine how to cope with loneliness, it is important to understand where it stems from in your life, and how it manifests. Causes of Loneliness Research into the topic, such as the UCLA Loneliness Scale, looks at various aspects of a person’s life, to what degree they feel left out or included, how “in tune” they feel with those around them (including their spouse or romantic partner and family), and whether they feel that they have at least one person they can turn to in times of strife Among the adult population aged between twenty-two and thirty-five, the majority who experience loneliness are the unemployed and those of a lower income bracket. This is probably because most adult friendships are initiated in the workplace. [...]

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